


A Cold Case

by galaxy_witch, iguanastevens, Kenda1L, KinoGlowWorm, KuraiOfAnagura, Rodinia, Survivor_at_Midnight, thesameoldfairytale



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Collaboration, Detectives, First Kiss, M/M, Mystery, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-06-28 00:28:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19800937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxy_witch/pseuds/galaxy_witch, https://archiveofourown.org/users/iguanastevens/pseuds/iguanastevens, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kenda1L/pseuds/Kenda1L, https://archiveofourown.org/users/KinoGlowWorm/pseuds/KinoGlowWorm, https://archiveofourown.org/users/KuraiOfAnagura/pseuds/KuraiOfAnagura, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Rodinia, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Survivor_at_Midnight/pseuds/Survivor_at_Midnight, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesameoldfairytale/pseuds/thesameoldfairytale
Summary: Otabek and Yuri, along with the rest of the skating world, have come to Hasetsu for the Katsuki-Nikiforov wedding. Things get interesting when Otabek's backpack is stolen from his room. When he teams up with Yuri to find the missing item, their sleuthing leads to more than they bargained for.Can Yuri and Otabek track down the culprit and figure out what really happened as romance (finally) blossoms between them?





	1. case files #1-9 (CLASSIFIED)

**Author's Note:**

> This story is the product of a collaborative writing game. Each author signed up for a two-day slot. When their turn rolled around, they received the story as it was written so far and had only forty-eight hours to read the story and make their own contribution. The participants didn't have any information about the fic before this, aside from that it was an Otayuri detective story, and the only communication between authors was the story itself!   
> The commitment, imagination, and quick thinking shown by everyone involved made this a truly wonderful event to take part in. I'm grateful for the time and effort the authors put into bringing my silly idea to life.   
> \- iguanastevens, event organizer

**Prelude**

Otabek sighed as he shuffled around the room one last time, rifling through his luggage and piling blankets into a heap without really looking. His backpack hadn’t shown up the last three times he checked under the bed, after all.

“Yura,” he called softly into the hall. A moment later, a head of tangled blond hair appeared from another room. “Hey, have you seen my bag? I think I might have left it in your room.”

“Uh, let me check.” Yuri vanished, then reappeared shaking his head. “Nope. Wait, you haven’t even seen my room yet, have you?”

Otabek shrugged. “I thought you might have borrowed it for some reason. My door was open.”

“You left your door open?”

“No, it was open when I got back.” Otabek frowned, trying to remember the events of that morning. “I definitely left it here while I was jogging, and I don’t think I moved it after breakfast.”

“And your door was open,” Yuri added, matching Otabek’s frown with his own scowl. “Beka, someone stole it.”

**Crimes of Fashion - Wonder Cat**

“That’s not good.” Otabek groaned in frustration and leaned against the wall.

“What was in your backpack anyway?” Yuri peered into Otabek’s room through the slightly open door

“The wedding gift,” Otabek confessed after a short moment of silence.

“What the fuck?!” Yuri yelled, and Otabek dragged him into his room so they wouldn’t cause a scene on the hallway. “Why wasn’t it in your suitcase?!”

“Calm down, Yuri. I thought it was safe since I always keep it with me. I definitely locked the door behind me!” Otabek insisted, earning another scowl from Yuri.

“Well, whatever. The point is that we don’t have a present to give.” Yuri sighed and crossed his arms. “Do you remember anything suspicious? Or anything else? Maybe when you left?”

“I left around seven in the morning and returned about forty minutes later. I didn’t notice anything suspicious. Why?”

“There might be some people in the lounge. We could ask them if they saw or heard anything.”.

“Wow, Yura, I didn’t think you were that smart!” Otabek teased. Yuri punched his shoulder playfully.

“Enough already! Let’s go!” Yuri exclaimed with a slight blush on his face and left the room.

There weren’t many people in the lounge. Otabek and Yuri decided to ask them anyway, but almost everyone replied that they didn’t notice anything.

Only one person said they saw someone rushing down the stairs. That caught the duo’s attention.

“Do you remember what they looked like?” Otabek asked.

The man in front of them thought for a bit before shaking his head. “They ran by too fast, but they let something fall. It looked like blue lipstick. Here, I picked it up!”

They thanked the man and went back to Otabek’s room.

“That wasn’t very helpful,” Yuri lamented. “We’re never going to find the gift and the wedding is in two days! What if the morons find out?”

“They won’t. Don’t worry, Yura, we’ll find the thief,” Otabek reassured him.

“But how? We only have this damn piece of blue lipstick!” Yuri complained.

“Actually, this is our first clue. Later, we could ask the guests if someone is missing their lipstick,” Otabek suggested.

“Are we seriously going to ask _every_ guest? We don’t even know how many were invited!” Yuri groaned and kicked Otabek’s suitcase away.

“It’s better than nothing, Yura,” Otabek told him. “But let’s not tell Viktor and Yuuri about it. They have enough on their minds already.”

“Fine. Are you sure that the thief’s still here?”

“They’re probably an invited guest, and I don’t see any other reason for them to leave,” Otabek responded.

“Okay, you’re right. I guess we’d better start looking now.”

**Get a Clue - thesameoldfairytale**

Unfortunately, the rest of the evening didn’t give Yuri and Otabek many chances to speak to people about their first and only clue, the blue lipstick. Otabek’s backpack remained missing, much to Yuri’s dismay, and while he evening’s festivities included yet another dinner for all the guests who stayed at Yu-topia, the grooms were taking up so much of everyone’s attention that Yuri and Otabek barely had a chance to ask anyone any questions at all.

“We need to find this stupid backpack, Beka,” Yuri whined for probably the hundredth time that evening as he drowned the last bit of champagne from his glass. “There’s no way I’ll show up to that stupid wedding without a gift. Victor still thinks I’m just a stupid kid who doesn’t know what he’s doing. I’ll be damned before I prove him right.”

His best friend, most valued confidant, and secret crush stood next to him, his fingers curled around a half-empty glass of orange juice. Sometimes Yuri really admired Otabek’s determination to stay away from alcohol: he knew he wouldn’t be able to make it through events like weddings or even the banquets after competitions if he couldn’t have at least some alcohol.

Otabek probably thought that Yuri wouldn’t notice the way he was rolling his eyes. Yuri did.

“You spend too much time with me,” Yuri remarked, but he couldn’t stop himself from grinning. He didn’t have to explain what he meant. Otabek already knew.

“Learned from the best,” Otabek replied, a sly grin around the corners of his mouth.

It did bug Yuri that Otabek didn’t seem to be too bothered about the very real possibility that they’d be showing up to the wedding without a present Yuri himself was more agitated than he was ready to admit.

“So, what do we do now?” he asked, exasperated that he had to say it out loud.

Otabek just hummed around the rim of his glass, thinking. “Let me take another look at the lipstick,” he said, and held out his hand.

Yuri rummaged around in his pockets and quickly found the lipstick. He dropped it in Otabek’s hand, narrowing his eyes as he stared expectedly at Otabek, who studied the lipstick yet again.

“This is Chinese,” he said eventually, showing Yuri the inscriptions on the lipstick.

“So?” Yuri asked, confused as to why that could possibly be important. “I thought it was Japanese. That would make the most sense.”

Otabek looked up at him then. “You’ve spent so much time in Japan and you still don’t know what Japanese letters look like?”

It was Yuri’s turn to roll his eyes. “Okay, Mister High and Mighty,” he said, gently punching Otabek’s arm. “Why does it make a difference if the lipstick is from China and not from here?”

Otabek put his empty glass on a nearby table, carefully wrapped his fingers around Yuri’s wrist and quietly lead him away from the rest of the crowd out into the deserted hallway. “If someone bought the lipstick in China, chances are the person lives in China.”

Yuri pondered that assumption for just a moment, trying his best to not think about the fact that Otabek’s warm hand was still holding onto his wrist. “Not necessarily, Beka. This place is filled with internationally competing figure skaters. We’ve all been to China for competitions and the only person I know who’s here and from China is Guang Hong. I’ve never seen him wear lipstick.”

“What if he bought it for a friend? Someone who’s also invited to the wedding?” Otabek said, taking his hand away from Yuri.

The goose bumps on Yuri’s arm slowly evaporated. He refused to acknowledge how hot his skin was where Otabek had touched him. That was a case to be solved on another day.

“So what if he has?” Yuri asked as soon as he could more or less think properly again. He had a feeling he was blushing, but he hoped that Otabek wouldn’t notice it.

“Yura,” Otabek said, running a hand over his face. He seemed equally annoyed and amused, and Yuri didn’t know which one irritated him more. “Don’t you get it?”

“What is there to _get_?”

Yuri was getting really frustrated. Otabek needed to form proper sentences and spit out what on earth he was talking about. As far as Yuri was concerned, anyone could have bought a blue lipstick like this in China. Mila and Sara probably had at some point. Heck, even Leroy might have, but he didn’t think that any of them would be so bold and plain stupid as to steal someone else’s backpack.

“Yura, think,” Otabek said, holding onto him by his shoulders and looking right at him. His face was only a couple of inches away. Yuri suddenly couldn’t concentrate anymore. His entire body was now on fire.

He stared back at Otabek, but he had no idea what Otabek had asked him to think about. Yuri was so distracted that he could see Otabek talk again, but he didn’t hear what he was saying. Otabek’s lips were moving and Yuri’s eyes were on them, studying every single movement they made. He was so hypnotized that he didn’t realize when Otabek leaned forward.

It was impossible to enjoy the kiss, the quick brush of lips on lips - or whatever this was supposed to be: Yuri was so surprised when Otabek pressed his lips gingerly against his that it was over before he could even acknowledge that it was happening.

The second Otabek stepped back a little, Yuri reached up, brushing his fingers over his own lips to check that it really just happened.

“Now are you listening?” Otabek asked, a slight pink blush high on his cheeks.

“What?” Yuri looked Otabek in the eyes again, perplexed

“You weren’t listening,” Otabek said. “Or talking, for that matter.”

“What were we talking about?” Yuri wondered out loud, still confused as to what was really going on.

Otabek grabbed Yuri’s hand. He dragged him along once more, leading the way back into the room where the dinner was taking place.

“The lipstick,” Otabek explained. “Even if Guang Hong wasn’t the one rushing down the stairs away from my room, we have to talk to him. Maybe he gave the lipstick to someone as a present. We have to at least ask. Best case scenario is that he knows _something_.”

Yuri just followed silently, his eyes fixed on Otabek’s back, Otabek’s hand holding tightly onto his as they tried to guess where Guang Hong might be.

**Silk and Secrets - Survivor_at_Midnight**

It took the better part of two hours, but they finally found Guang Hong on the beach, of all places, playing with Makkachin. Probably because Viktor was too _preoccupied_ to watch his own dog.

Yuri stalked ahead, pulling his hand out of Otabek’s and skidding to a stop in front of the Chinese skater, nearly scaring him to death. Otabek tried to ignore how much colder it felt without Yuri next to him.

“Oi, Guang Hong. You can read Chinese right?” Yuri prodded. It was late enough that Yuri was starting to become irritable because of lack of sleep. Well, more irritable than normal. Otabek quickly sidled up to Yuri and gave tugged sharply on the back of his jacket, to which Yuri gave him an indignant huff.

“Um, yeah,” Guang Hong replied. “I grew up speaking Mandarin. Why?”

“Nothing special,” Otabek shrugged. “We were just hoping you could help us read this.” He pulled out the lipstick from his pocket and handed it over.

Guang Hong turned the small tube over in his hands, squinting to see the small print in the dim light of the moon. Otabek watched him in turn, looking for any hint that he might have seen the lipstick before. He didn’t see any telltale signs - no fidgeting or trembling, and his breathing was normal. But that didn’t mean anything. They had no way of knowing if this lipstick even belonged to the person who broke into his room.

“I think this came from an underground fashion shop,” Guang Hong mused as he looked at the label.

“A what now?” Yuri asked with a slight tilt of his head.

Guang Hong handed the tube back to Otabek. “A lot of the major cities in China have an underground shopping section. In Shanghai, one of the entrances is a shop on Changle Road. The underground scene has a lot of cheap stuff.”

“What else is around there?” Otabek asked.

“Well...” Guang Hong patted Makkachin and threw the dog another toy as he thought. “Changle Road is known for being a huge traditional silk center. The underground markets tend to be more trend-oriented and full of knockoffs.”

Otabek shot a Yuri quick glance. That could be useful.

“Thanks, Guang Hong. Later.” Yuri grabbed Otabek’s arm again and power-walked away. Otabek let himself be dragged all the way back to Yuri’s room - which was, predictably, already a mess.

He watched as Yuri flung himself down on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

“So, our thief was apparently in Shanghai and into cheap knockoffs?” Yuri asked the ceiling. Otabek sat on the edge of the bed, close enough to Yuri that their legs brushed, one hand on his chin as he thought.

“In Shanghai, probably. I’m not too sure about the knockoffs. Guang Hong said the entrance to the underground fashion market was on a street that had a lot of traditional silk. That isn’t cheap.” He pulled out the small plastic tube again. “Our thief could be someone who’s into expensive clothing.” Otabek paused and looked over at Yuri, who was still sprawled out over the duvet, tapping away at his phone.

Yuri didn’t even look at him as he continued texting. “Mila, the hag, she always knows how to get stuff for dirt cheap. And she orders from _everywhere_. She’s probably been to this place before.”

Otabek took a second to try and follow Yuri’s logic. “But we don’t know if this came from the underground or not. She wouldn’t-”

Yuri rolled his eyes. “No, she wouldn’t, but the Italian girl she’s always hanging around will.”

Ah, there it was. “Sara Crispino.”

“Bingo.”

It made sense, Otabek supposed. The Crispino twins were almost always dressed to the nines. If anyone would know about traditional Chinese silk more than someone from China, it would be one of them. “So, how do we find her?”

“ _Them_ , Beka. Mila knows how to find the best bargains and Sara can smell a knockoff a mile away.”

Well, Yuri was just full of surprises today. Otabek couldn’t have stopped the awe building in him if he tried. He very rarely got to see this side of Yuri, the side that was sharp as a tack and quick as a whip. It was something he took for granted, Yuri’s hidden genius, but the few times it came out full force like this, it blew Otabek away.

“Hey, Beka, you didn’t hear a thing I just said.”

Otabek shook himself out of his daze and refocused on Yuri, who had gotten off of the bed while he was distracted and was now standing over him. “Sorry, Yura. Say it again?”

Yuri huffed and blew a strand of hair out of his face, only to have it flop back down in place again.

“I _said_ ,” he drew out, “So far we know that this lipstick fell from someone running away from the general direction of your room. This lipstick came from either the traditional rich side or the new-age underground of Shanghai. You with me still?”

Otabek stifled his laugh. “Yes. And we’re about to find Mila and Sara and ask them about their recent shopping experiences?”

Yuri grinned a little lopsidedly, a pink blush creeping up his neck. “In a minute.”

He took a step forward, pushing just a little closer than before and bracing his hands gingerly on Otabek’s shoulders. Otabek, in turn, shifted to let Yuri step between his legs, but otherwise didn’t move to stop him.

“Earlier, I wasn’t all there. Distracted,” Yuri mumbled softly. “So could we, maybe… try again?”

How could Otabek refuse that?

He reached up and tucked a lock of blonde hair behind Yuri’s ear, letting his fingers trail down to his jaw, gently tugging him closer. He felt Yuri hesitate for the slightest moment and froze, letting him decide what to do, but then Yuri pressed forward and pressed their lips together and then entire world around them ceased to exist.

It wasn’t like last time, when Yuri stood stock still and Otabek had barely brushed their lips together. This was infinitely better. Yuri was soft and sweet against him, almost nervous with the way he pressed into Otabek. He felt Yuri’s fingers tightening at the shoulders of his jacket and responded by tilting Yuri’s head the last little bit to deepen the kiss. That earned him a soft sigh, and Otabek wanted to hear it again and again and again.

And then Yuri’s phone went off.

Yuri startled right out of Otabek’s grasp, twisting around to glare at the offending object hidden in the covers. Otabek leaned back in amusement as Yuri stretched over and groped around in the sheets for his phone instead of getting up to look for it.

Yuri _tsked_ in annoyance when he opened the notification.

“They’re in room 204. Let’s go.”

Otabek had almost forgotten about their previous conversation, and Yuri looked downright pissed to be interrupted. Just as Yuri was about to spin around towards the door, Otabek grabbed his hands and pulled him back, tugging him just a bit closer than he was before.

“You’re amazing, Yura,” Otabek murmured just as Yuri stumbled into his arms. He felt Yuri’s tense arms relax again, hugging him back after a heartbeat.

He didn’t want to let Yuri go and almost grabbed him again as Yuri finally took a single step away - just enough room for Otabek to stand up. But time was ticking, and they had a thief to catch, so he just linked their hands and they started off for room 204.

**The Skeleton Key - iguanastevens**

Talking was good, Yuri decided. Talking helped him think out loud, and thinking out loud meant that all the other thoughts zipping around his head had to shut up and wait their turn.

“I can’t figure out why Mila would break into your room,” Yuri said. He rolled his eyes and continued, “ _My_ room, sure, she takes my stuff all the time. Hag. Or Sara. And what would she want with your backpack?”

“We don’t have any reason to think either of them did it,” Otabek cautioned, then caught Yuri’s wrist to stop him from colliding with another guest in the doorway. “All we have to go on is the lipstick.”

“Guilty until proven innocent, Beka.” Yuri’s voice cracked. Otabek hadn’t quite let go of his arm; instead, his fingers had slipped down until they intertwined with Yuri’s own, and detective work suddenly didn’t seem quite so urgent as it had before. Not that sort of detective work, anyway. His mind was being taken over by other questions, like, _hey, how long do you think we can make out in the janitor’s closet before someone finds us_ and _what if we skip their wedding and have our own_ and _so is this a thing or not a thing and if it’s not a thing, could it become a thing?_ He interrupted his runaway thoughts. “To catch a thief, you have to think like a thief.”

Amusement flickered in Otabek’s eyes. “Think like a thief, huh?”

“Yes,” Yuri said, tearing his stare from Otabek’s almost-there smile and tugging him up the stairs. “And that means trusting no one.”

“Or… hmm. Why would a thief be carrying blue lipstick?”

“What?”

“If I was a thief, I wouldn’t stop at just one room,” Otabek said slowly. “Even if I was looking for something in particular, I’d want to confuse the trail.”

“You’d steal a bunch of stuff so it wasn’t obvious what you were looking for. So, if the person who dropped the lipstick was the same one who took your backpack, they might have stolen the lipstick as well,” Yuri finished. He grinned. “You make a good detective, Altin.”

“Thanks.” He squeezed Yuri’s hand gently. “We should ask if anything else has gone missing.”

“Let’s start with Mila and Sara.”

They stepped out of the stairwell and into the hall just as Mari Katsuki popped out of a room carrying a basket of linens. She closed the door behind her with a deft flick of her foot, not bothering to turn around.

“Yurio. Hey. And, uh… Otabek, right?” She glanced at their linked hands and back to Yuri, pointedly ignoring the obvious question. “You were here a last year with Yurio.”

“Yes, last summer.” Otabek was courteous as always, and very few people would have been able to pick up on the note of distraction in his voice. Yuri was one of those people. “Do you need any help?”

Yuri kicked his ankle as a gentle reminder that they had other things on their agenda, but Otabek squeezed his hand again. _Wait,_ he motioned with an imperceptible shake of his head.

Mari snorted. “Nah, I’m good, but tell Yuuri to give back the extra key if he’s not making himself useful. Oh, and Mom wants to ask him something.”

She disappeared downstairs, and Yuri turned to Otabek.

“What was that about?” he demanded, impatient and burning with curiosity. “Beka, tell me!”

“My door wasn’t forced open,” Otabek said, dropping to a low murmur. “It was unlocked. Either I forgot to lock it…”

“Or they had a key!” Yuri exclaimed, punching the air. “Shit, oops.” He matched Otabek’s whisper. “Or they had a key. And Mari asked us to tell Yuuri to return the other key, which must be one of the master keys, which mean’s it’s missing.”

“They also could have picked the lock, and Yuuri really does have the key.” Otabek shrugged. “It’s just a thought. We should ask Yuuri about it. If he doesn’t have it, then we need to tell the Katsukis. That’s more than a prank.”

“You think it’s a prank?” Yuri grimaced. “Shitty joke.”

“It might be. I don’t want to call the authorities if it’s just someone messing with me.”

“Maybe we can find Yuuri after we talk to Mila and Sara,” Yuri agreed. Even Victor and Yuuri weren't dramatic enough to enjoy filing police reports right before their wedding. “204, right?”

Otabek nodded.

Yuri knocked. A moment later, the door swung open and Mila appeared, flushed and giggling. Her face was covered with thick layers of makeup, bright pink eyeshadow that clashed with her red hair before descending to do battle with dark orange lipstick.

“What the hell?” Yuri asked, nonplussed, before he recovered from the assault on his senses and nudged Otabek.

“Makeovers!” Sara called from behind Mila. “Oh, Yuri, want to give it a go? I have some great purples, I think you’d love them-”

“Absolutely not,” he insisted. He'd been down this path before. Sure, maybe it started out fun, but it didn't stay that way. Even without Sara to egg her on, Mila thought fashion was a bloodsport. Otabek, the traitor, was breaking down in silent laughter at his side. “No way, I am not-”

“We’ll share our booze.” Mila smirked. “A little birdie told me that _someone_ wasn’t old enough to drink in Japan.”

“It’s barely noon!” Yuri protested, eyeing the mascara wand with dismay. She was going to put someone's eye out with that thing, and it was not going to be his. “Besides, we’re busy.”

“You could collect later,” Sara offered.

Oh, they were playing dirty. Yuri gritted his teeth, and then-

“I’ll try,” said Otabek. He let go of Yuri’s hand as Sara and Mila approached with eerily bright smiles. “That’s sort of why we came by.”

Mila blinked. “For a makeover?”

“Makeup,” Yuri said, quickly forgiving Otabek for his previous betrayal. He was no traitor. He was braver than Yuri, willing to make sacrifices, and - now that it was brought to Yuri’s attention - would look really, really good in eyeliner. He pushed the thought away and summoned up what was hopefully a calculating scowl. “Do you recognize…” He pulled out the lipstick. “ _This?_ ”

“What? Oh.” Mila plucked the tube from his hand and peered at it. “Why do you have Georgi’s lipstick?”

“Georgi’s-” Otabek began, but Sara hushed him and dabbed at his face.

“Georgi’s lipstick?” Yuri frowned. If anyone would carry around blue lipstick, it would be Georgi, but… “It’s Chinese.”

“Yeah, I think it’s his.” Mila shrugged. “They gave out goodie bags at the Cup of China a couple years ago, I think? Some promo thing. Georgi liked it so much that he wore it for one of his programs. He asked around and got a bunch of tubes from the other skaters.”

“Everyone there got some, then.” Yuri’s heart fell. Damn. They were so close to an answer. “Ugh. Oh, right. Are either of you missing anything?”

“I don’t think so,” Sara replied absently. “Hold still, Otabek - perfect, thanks. I haven’t noticed anything. Why, did you find something besides the lipstick?”

“No. Mila?”

“Not that I know of. Yura, why-”

“Where were you this morning?” Yuri interrupted. Mila’s expression was innocent, but he’d seen her with the same wide, guileless smile after ‘borrowing’ his favorite jacket.

“Yura…”

“We really should go,” Otabek said, standing up. “Thank you for your help.”

“I just got started!” Sara pouted. “Just another few minutes? This is going to be great, I promise.”

“Nope, sorry, gotta go!”

Yuri yanked Otabek out of the room.

“Well,” he grumbled, “that was…”

He’d been right: Otabek did look good in eyeliner.

**Riddles, Mysteries, and Enigmas - KinoGlowWorm**

Yuri heard it before he saw it, but that didn’t really make it that much easier to explain.

_Booop. Booop._ Otabek’s voice, tone rising with the first and falling with the latter.

As he came into view, Otabek was sitting on the edge of the bed when idly twisting the lipstick up and back down in its little tube, the tone following the path of the blue lipstick as it rose and fell. He didn’t notice Yuri as he stepped closer. His face was glazed, distant. His eyeliner still looked perfect.

Yuri took a step back towards the door and coughed gently, trying not to laugh too loud as Otabek sprang from the bed in surprise, almost falling over himself to try to stand up and turn around.

“Fuck,” Otabek said as the lipstick clattered to the floor and out of sight, on hands and knees almost immediately.

“There’s not too many places it could have gone in here,” Yuri added as he got down on the floor, momentarily distracted by the way Otabek’s gray sweats clung to his body.

“You have your phone?” Otabek asked, peering under the low platform of the bed. “I can’t see a thing under here.”

“Yeah, uh,” Yuri patted his pockets. “Er, actually no. I must have left it in Mila and Sara’s room. Where’s yours?”

“On the bed,” Otabek replied, gesturing broadly while still trying to look under the bed. “But my charger’s in the backpack and it’s dead.”

“Fuck, that’s no good. I’d offer you mine, but-”

“I’ll live,” Otabek said, flattening himself against the floor and forcing his arm as far as he could manage under the bed, his face twisted with uncomfortable effort as he swept his arm awkwardly in the dark space. “It’s got to be under here.”

The bed frame shifted slightly with a sickening creak as it slid across the floor.

“Why don’t we just move the stupid thing?” Yuri said, as his shoulders relaxed from where he’d cringed at the sound.

Otabek painstakingly extracted himself from under the bed frame.

They coordinated to shift the futon and its platform to the side, as far as it could go, revealing the base of the lipstick, the base and the stick broken apart. Otabek clambered over the bed from where he had trapped himself in a corner to retrieve the pieces.

“Georgi won’t be mad, will he?” Otabek asked, looking helplessly at the pieces in his hand. “I feel kinda bad.”

“Save it for when we know he didn’t take your backpack.”

“How generous of you.”

“Eh, it’s Georgi. He probably didn’t take it, but he’s going to be dramatic whatever happens, so it’s usually not worth trying to protect his emotions.”

“Remind me again why I’m friends with you.”

Yuri arched an eyebrow, but his eyes soon darted to the floor, jerking back up to meet Otabek’s. His cheeks burned.

“We can probably put it back together,” Yuri said, sitting down beside Otabek on the futon and reaching for the pieces.

Yuri peered into the casing, trying to see if he could figure out the twist mechanism. A curled edge stuck out oddly. There seemed to be a piece of paper rolled up inside.

“There’s something in here.” Yuri shook the casing vigorously, then swiped it with a slender pinky, sliding out enough of the paper’s edge that he could pull the rest of it out.

“What is it?”

“Knowing Georgi, probably some kind of shitty love poem he wanted to keep somewhere special,” Yuri said, unfurling the paper and then unfolding it.

“Georgi didn’t write that, did he?” Otabek asked, peering over Yuri’s shoulder.

“Not unless Georgi’s keeping some secrets, too.”

**A Collector’s Item - Kenda1l**

Otabek pressed against Yuri from shoulder to thigh and wrapped his arm around his back under the pretense of reading the paper. Yuri shivered and glanced at him with exasperation, but the curl of his lips betrayed amusement.

“Wow, Beka. Very subtle.”

Otabek shrugged and, on a whim, leaned forward to kiss the tip of Yuri’s nose. Yuri went bright red and Otabek _felt_ the heat of his blush. He wasn’t sure what gave him the courage to actually kiss him the first time, but he was so glad he did.

“What?” he asked, smiling innocently. Yuri huffed and nudged him with his shoulder but didn’t pull away, so Otabek took it as a win.

“Stop being distracting,” Yuri grumbled. He very pointedly turned his gaze back to the paper. Otabek gamely followed suit. They had plenty of time to explore their budding relationship - a thought which made Otabek hide his giddy smile in Yuri’s shoulder - but they had a pretty firm deadline on solving the mystery if they wanted to get Viktor and Yuuri’s present back in time for the wedding.

Otabek frowned as he scanned the paper. Carefully printed in unfamiliar handwriting was a list of objects.

  1. Blue Lipstick
  2. 3 Metres Silk
  3. Bag
  4. Shoes - platform
  5. Box, large (v. large)
  6. Y&V’s cake topper
  7. Watch
  8. Necklace
  9. Laptop
  10. Thimble



The list went on from there, becoming increasingly bizarre with each item.

“They’re going to steal the cake topper?”

That was concerning. Otabek wasn’t sure if it would be Yuuri or Viktor who melted down, but he could guarantee one of them would. While he normally would have found it somewhat amusing to watch, a wedding was high enough in drama already. Besides, he liked Yuuri and Viktor; if their wedding was ruined, he would feel really bad.

Yuri, however, didn’t seem to have thought that far ahead.

“Forget that,” he growled. “They’re trying to take our gift!”

Otabek’s lips twitched involuntarily. “I’m pretty sure that’s not our biggest problem right now, Yura.”

“I know that. I’m still pissed. That’s _our_ gift, and it’s going to blow everyone else’s gifts away. We have to get back.”

It _was_ a pretty good gift. Still. Priorities. If Yuri wasn’t going to have them, then it was up to Otabek to keep them on track.

“Focus, Yura. A lot of these things are going to be noticed if they suddenly disappear. We need to keep asking around.” Otabek shrugged and ran a hand through Yuri’s hair. “But hey, at least now we have a good idea of what to ask about.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Yuri jumped to his feet and shoved the list in his pocket. “Come on, everyone will be in the hot springs. We can ask all at once.” When Otabek didn’t automatically follow, he gestured impatiently. “Beka, come on.”

Otabek shook his head, still thinking.

“Maybe we should wait.” He cut Yuri’s protest off before it started. “Everyone will be there. Including Yuuri and Viktor,” he reminded him. Yuri wilted a little and pinched his lower lip between his fingers -probably trying to hide the fact that he was pouting, Otabek thought fondly. It wasn’t working, but it did make him ache to kiss him again. And again. Maybe they could just stay in the room, learn each other’s bodies.

“Ugh, they’re going to throw a shit fit, aren’t they?” Yuri said, bringing Otabek’s brain out of its spiral straight into the gutter. Yuri wasn’t really asking a question. He growled in frustration and pulled at his hair as he paced. “The longer we wait, the more likely the culprit is to get away, though.”

He stopped suddenly, eyes lighting up. It was a look Otabek recognized. It appeared every time Yuri was about to suggest something likely to get them in trouble. Otabek braced himself. Yuri grinned and slunk closer. His innocent look was not at all convincing.

“I guess one of us will just have to distract them while the other does the questioning.”

Otabek was capable of coming up with plenty of ways to distract them. None of them were good ideas in any sense of the term.

“Or we could wait for the bachelors’ party,” he suggested instead. “It’ll be easy to pull people aside, and Yuuri and Viktor will be way too drunk to notice anything weird.”

Yuri’s terrible faux innocent look twisted into a pout. “That’s hours away,” he whined, but at least he looked like he was considering the option. “Whatever we do, we should decide soon. At least now we know who to talk to first.”

Otabek raised an eyebrow. “We do?”

Yuri nodded happily, doing an abrupt about face. “This list is in English, right? And it’s not American English because they used meters instead of whatever stupid measuring system they use there. You know who that means.”

Otabek groaned. “JJ.”

Yuri’s grin turned viciously gleeful.

“JJ fucking Ledouche,” he agreed.

**The Mystery of the Stolen Heart - galaxy_witch**

Yuri was quick to rise; he sloppily stuffed the broken pieces of the lipstick back into the tube and shoved it into his pocket. The list was held tight in his hand as he rose from the hardwood floor and bolted out of the door.

Otabek leapt up and followed close behind.

He didn’t even need to ask where Yuri was headed: Otabek knew that Yuri would take any opportunity he was given to rip JJ to shreds. The two nearly ran down the hall and into the direction of JJ’s room, not even slowing as Mila and Sara rounded the corner and gave them both a friendly wave. There was no stopping Yuri when he had an idea in his mind, and it was one of the many qualities that Otabek quietly admired. 

“Yura,” Otabek started as he attempted to match Yuri’s quick pace, “what if he isn’t in there? He could be in the hot springs with everyone else.”

“I know,” Yuri replied, but he didn’t stop moving. “But there’s only one way to find out.”

They approached JJ’s room, and Yuri brought a fist up and pounded against JJ’s door without any hesitation at all.

“Hey, asshole!” Yuri growled as he continuously pounded on the door. “Open up!”

The door finally swung open after a few more loud bangs, and standing on the other side of the door was none other than JJ himself, accompanied by his fiancée, Isabella. They both had robes on and towels in their hands; Otabek was thankful that they caught JJ before he went to the hot springs–being that he was their prime suspect at that moment.

“Otabek, Yuri!” JJ greeted the pair with a too-wide smile. “What’s up? We’re heading to the hot springs soon, wanna join us?”

“Don’t play dumb, we’re onto you,” Yuri threatened, passing through the doorway and entering the room uninvited.

“What? What did I do?” JJ asked, and Yuri shot Otabek a suspicious glare as he entered the room behind Yuri.

Otabek turned to JJ, and either JJ was an amazing actor, or he genuinely had no clue why the two had come barging into his room.

“Let’s just get to the point–did you take my backpack?” Otabek asked bluntly, moving to stand in the middle of the room next to Yuri.

JJ and Isabella both looked at Yuri and Otabek, confused, and shut the door. They retreated back into the room to talk with the pair of visibly bothered skaters.

“Your backpack? No, why?”

Before Otabek could answer, Yuri shoved the small, now crumpled, piece of paper into JJ’s face.

“Well, do you have anything to say about this?” Yuri demanded as he held out the list.

JJ squinted and took hold of the paper, examining the items as Otabek explained the situation.

“Someone took my bag,” Otabek started, “and we think that the person who did it is planning on stealing the items on this list.”

Otabek turned to Yuri, who was scowling in JJ’s direction, and reached into his friend’s pocket, pulling out the lipstick. At first, Otabek missed the momentary blush on Yuri’s face at the comfortable familiarity of the touch, but Isabella didn’t -she giggled behind her hand as Otabek held the lipstick out to JJ.

“We found the list in this lipstick tube, and we think that whoever this lipstick belongs to is the culprit.”

JJ stared at Otabek, the list, and the lipstick for a moment before breaking out into a fit of laughter. At this point Yuri was red with anger instead of embarrassment, and Otabek was losing his patience.

“Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?” JJ said through his laughter. “I’m amazed you came to such a wild conclusion, Beks. You’ve always been more level headed.”

“It’s not funny,” Yuri growled, coming to Otabek’s defense. “This person took our wedding gift, and they’re going to steal the cake topper. This wedding will be ruined and I will have to listen to those disgusting lovebirds cry and complain if we don’t stop it!”

“Here, let me see that,” Isabella insisted as she reached out to JJ for the list and Otabek for the lipstick. “Isn’t this Georgi’s lipstick? I thought I saw him wearing it the other day when everyone arrived.”

“Possibly, but apparently all of the Cup of China participants received the same tube.”

“Why would you think I did this, then? We weren’t even at the Cup of China!”

“Well, the list is in English. And look–3 metres of silk–I know you use the metric system!”

JJ laughed. “Yeah, and so does the rest of the world excluding the USA, Burma, and Liberia. Considering that almost all of us are multilingual, you have no basis for your slander.” JJ raised his hand and dramatically brought it to his heart, faking a look of offense.

“Then who the hell else would have written this list?” Yuri was frustrated and becoming more so the longer they talked to JJ. Otabek wanted to smooth the frown lines on Yuri’s forehead and kiss them away–but ideally he’d do so once they were both at least fifty meters or more away from JJ.

“Wait- guys!” Isabella said, capturing the attention of the three boys. “There’s a necklace on this list. I realized this morning that I misplaced my gold necklace with the heart-shaped charm that Jean-Jacques got me for my birthday last year.”

Otabek and Yuri turned to each other, wide-eyed and excited at the prospect of another clue.

“Wait, Bella- really?!” JJ asked, looking almost like a kicked puppy.

“I-I didn’t tell you earlier because I didn’t want to upset you. I didn’t even consider the idea that my necklace was stolen- I thought I just misplaced it.”

“Aw, Bells, I wouldn’t have been upset with you. Also, you’re the smartest woman I’ve ever met,” JJ cooed over at his fiancée and wrapped an arm around her waist.

“So, we aren’t the only ones missing something,” Otabek noted, and Isabella handed the lipstick and list back to him. “We should keep an eye out for the necklace as we continue looking.”

“Look at you two little detectives. You almost make as cute a couple as Bella and me,” JJ teased before planting a kiss on Isabella’s cheek.

“That’s none of your business asshole! We’re not, um–” Yuri stammered. He snuck a questioning glance over at Otabek.

“I mean, we could be,” Otabek replied with all the ease in the world despite feeling panicked on the inside. Of all the times to talk about their feelings, Otabek couldn’t believe that this was the moment he chose.

“Beka,” Yuri nearly whined, and he brought a hand up to hide his flushed face.

“We can talk later,” Otabek replied and grabbed Yuri’s hand. “Right now we should just go find the others.”

“Kay,” Yuri agreed, and he accepted Otabek’s hand in his own.

“Good luck you two! On this case, but also that other thing.” JJ said with a wink, and Yuri promptly stuck his tongue out in JJ’s direction. Otabek just ignored him.

“Thanks for the lead, Isabella. Come find us if either of you see or hear something suspicious.” Otabek politely nodded at them both. 

“Well, it was horrible to see you, JJ. Bye.” Yuri tugged on Otabek’s hand and pulled him out of the room, desperate to no longer be in JJ’s presence.

“I’m not sure if that was helpful or not helpful at all,” Yuri said as they began their walk back down the hallway.

“I agree. It’s good to know that we’re not the only one’s missing something, but I don’t think we should necessarily rule JJ out as a suspect. Isabella’s necklace could have been a coincidence.”

“Oh, I’m with you. I don’t trust a word that asshole says,” Yuri spat through gritted teeth.

“Well, we’re running out of time and solid leads. I think we need to confront the other Cup of China skaters and go from there. Hopefully we’ll be able to find at least a few of them around.”

“How are we going to confront any of them without Victor and Yuuri noticing?” Yuri asked as they approached the doors to the hot springs.

“I guess we’ll just have to figure something out.” Otabek sighed and pushed the doors open.

**If the Shoe Fits - KuraiOfAnagura**

If you were an athlete, any kind of shyness over your own nudity tended to evaporate very quickly once faced with shared locker rooms during practice and competition. However, while they’d seen each other in several different states of undress, that was all before… today. Before the shy and tender kisses, the intertwined fingers, and the raging storms of butterflies in their bellies.

Otabek had apparently decided to treat the problem at hand with his usual stoic force. He ripped his shirt from his torso like it was a bandaid.

Yuri’s skin, thanks to his pale complexion, showed any kind of blush as soon as it dared to arise, and now was no exception. “I’ll get my phone!” Yuri announced, suddenly very loud in the small changing room. “You ask the others!”

He stumbled away, leaving Otabek behind looking more than a little lost.

_Shit, shit, shit!_ Yuri clutched his head between his hands as he crouched down in the hallway that lead to the outdoor bathing area. He wanted to rip his hair out for how stupid he’d acted. Like the small child both Victor and Mila still claimed he was!

But he couldn’t help himself. When Otabek took off his shirt, something inside of his brain had short circuited and he’d felt as if he’d lost all control. That had scared him enough into fleeing the scene.

_Fuck this, I’m not a small child!_ He thought vigorously, but a voice in his head noted that he’d never been in that kind of situation before. Otabek was his first… whatever, in many things.

Defeated, he slunk to the main area of the onsen, somewhat determined to get his phone from Mila’s room and then man up enough to enter the water with the other men.

“Look, look, look what the cat dragged in. A kitten!” The sultry French accented voice ripped him out of his gloomy thoughts.

Yuri suppressed a shudder, as he always did when he heard Christophe’s voice unprepared. “What are you doing here? Why aren’t you at the onsen?”

“I could ask you the same, mon petit chaton. These days, you appear to be attached by the hip to our Hero, no?”

The blush was back full force and dared to overwhelm him again, but something in Christophe’s behavior ticked him off as odd. He usually got along quite well with Christophe, as long as he wasn’t in his mature _eros_ mood. He made a decent enough conversational partner who loved to discuss his cat with Yuri. The two had spent more than one banquet over comparing pictures of Potya and Blanche, which was why Yuri could see that Christophe made sure he couldn’t read the collage book in front of him.

_He’s hiding something._ The thought came sudden and unbidden in his mind.

“I forgot my phone in Mila’s room. What’s your excuse?”

Christophe tutted with a smug smile and closed the book, further fueling Yuri’s curiosity. Of course, he couldn’t know from just seeing the paper, but he really wanted to compare the list in the lipstick to that book.

“It’s no excuse. I’m planning Vitya’s part of the bachelor party later today.”

Well, okay, that was a believable reason. The wedding was to be blessed by a priest, along with a huge mishmash of different traditions. It was as if Victor had taken a look at the different wedding customs all over the world and adopted everything he liked for their own wedding. Phichit and Christophe were their best men and - Yuri didn’t understand why -Mila, Sara and Yuuko were the bridesmaids… totally ignoring the fact that a) there was no bride and b) that Yuuko (and Mila, Yuri knew that for sure) was no maid anymore. He even went so far as to ask Yuri to be the flower girl, probably only to get under his skin. Yuuri relaxed the situation by stating that the triplets were more than enough, and if Yuri wished to be part of the ceremony, he could always say so.

“So far it’s Georgi and me. I’m sure Vitya would enjoy something smaller for once. I would invite you too, but it seems that you’re still too young to drink anywhere, and frankly, that’s what we’re going to do.”

Yuri rolled his eyes at the obvious jab, but again did his best to ignore it. If Christophe, Georgi, and Victor were all in one place, that meant Phichit had hoarded the rest of the men for Yuuri’s side of the bachelor party. The girls, and those too young, like him and Guang Hong, were doomed to stay at the inn.

“Where are you drinking?”

“Well, wouldn’t you like to know, petit chaton?” Christophe threw him a wink and braced his arms against the low table to stand up. He towered a good fifteen centimeters higher over Yuri than usual, giving a little smile and yet another wink as he followed Yuri’s gaze towards his platform shoe-clad feet.

“Oh, I don’t know what he’s planned with these, but the groom has asked me to break them in until the wedding. As the good best man that I am, I of course oblige, no?” Christophe sauntered past him, the book still clutched at his side and with way too much grace for somebody on such ridiculous shoes.

Yuri was fast to rush to Mila’s room and retrieve his phone. The changing area was thankfully empty this time and he washed himself in record time. As an afterthought, he put the small white towel in front of his crotch before he opened the milky glass door that lead to the outdoor area. He was greeted with laughter and a chorus of _hello’s_ from the other skaters. Thankfully, Otabek sat a tad away from the others and was submerged to the shoulders. Yuri looked up at the sky as he sunk down into the heavenly water next to him.

“I need to tell you something,” he whispered to Otabek, whose eyebrows darted upwards. “I’ve just met Chris in the lobby and boy, was he strange!”

He was sure Chris was hiding something, that he was sure of. He’d also been at the Cup of China, and the platform shoes were only the cherry on top of the suspicious cake.

He needed to tell Otabek all of that, and he was painfully aware that they should also talk about this… thing between them. Of course, preferably not while sitting naked within arm’s reach, surrounded by the other top male figure skaters.

“I’ve found another clue, too,” Otabek said. “I think we need to keep an eye on Phichit.”

**An Inside Job - Rodinia**

“Phichit. Why Phichit?” That didn’t make any sense to Yuri:Phichit was almost going Bridezilla about having everything perfect, and it wasn’t even his wedding. He wouldn’t mess with stuff - especially not stealing the wedding topper.

Also, he was… he was _Phichit._ Sure, he loved a good mischief, but actual malice? Yuri’s brain was breaking trying to make sense of the idea.

Otabek shrugged, leaning back to get lower in the water. “He was at the Cup of China. He loves makeup and stuff, so it makes sense that he’d keep the lipstick instead of giving it to Georgi. He lived in America for years, so he speaks English very well, but would probably use metric because he’s from Thailand. And also, he was out here when Yuuri came out and hauled him off for a private conversation. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but Phichit handed him something. Yuuri and Phichit are best friends. If Phichit asked to borrow a key, Yuuri wouldn’t ask questions, he’d just let him borrow it.”

Yuri thought it over, and sure enough, he had to admit that it sounded plausible. He was still having trouble getting his head around Phichit being malicious, but there was enough there that Yuri couldn’t just blow it off. “Why, though?”

“Hell if I know. Not like we have motives for anyone else, either.”

**The Eleventh Hour**

No motives, no real leads, and no backpack… but somehow, they had to use that heap of nothing to save a wedding. Even their shared bath wasn’t enough to lift Yuri’s spirits. If the sight of Otabek lounging naked in a hot spring couldn’t distract him, shit had gotten serious.

Yuri closed his eyes, ducked his head under the water, and screamed.

“Better?” Otabek asked as Yuri re-emerged, sputtering and gasping.

“Ugh,” Yuri grumbled back. “Okay. We can fucking do this.

“We have all day tomorrow. We should take a break.” Otabek ignored Yuri’s scandalized stare. “It’s like training - if you can’t land a jump, sometimes you have to stop trying, clear your head, and come back to it later.”

Huh. Maybe that was what Yakov had been yelling about.

“We can try,” Yuri replied skeptically. “It has to be obvious, right? We just need to figure out what we’re missing.”

This was supposed to be fun, and easy, and yeah, maybe also a way to show off for Otabek and that part had apparently worked better than Yuri could have hoped for, but-

“Fuck this,” he groaned. “We’ll-”

“Yurio, Otabek, hi.”

Yuri yelped in surprise, but Yuuri Katsuki didn’t even flinch at the spray of water from Yuri’s splash.

“Goddammit,” Yuri growled. “Katsudon, I will drown you and let Victor drag your sodden corpse down the aisle if you sneak up like that again.”

“Hello,” Otabek added. “How are you?”

“Oh, you know. Busy.” Yuuri’s smile was so tense that Yuri could have played his lips like a guitar. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but could you two come out to the front garden in about half an hour?”

“Sure,” Otabek said. One eyebrow twitched, barely visible, but Yuri was fluent in Altinese: he was worried. “Is...”

Yuuri waved off the question.

“We’re asking everyone to meet us outside. We have a short announcement to make.”

“Katsudon, what-”

“Thanks! If you see anyone else, let them know.”

Yuuri hurried away.

Yuri and Otabek stared at each other in dumbfounded silence.

“Weddings are difficult,” Otabek offered. “It’s normal for him to be stressed.”

“Yeah, he’s been freaking out all day,” Yuri agreed. “They probably found Christophe trying to hide in the cake.”

They paused to listen to the gentle, soothing slosh of the water.

“Fuck.”

Otabek groaned. “Agreed.”

* * *

**The end is nigh. The chips are down. The game is on. The- well, you get the gist. It’s time to rip the mask off this mystery once and for all.**

**Tune in next week to find out how our detectives will catch the culprit, recover the missing items, and save the wedding... that is, if they can crack the case at all.**


	2. Dog Days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of our detectives claims to have solved the case... but can Otabek and Yuri convince everyone to accept the brutal truth?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written by [iguanastevens](https://archiveofourown.org/users/iguanastevens/profile)

Otabek dragged a comb through his hair. He could see Yuri’s reflection in the mirror, wearing only a towel and an abundance of gloomy indignation. As he watched, Yuri sighed, frowned with dissatisfaction, and heaved another more dramatic sigh before adding a groan for good measure.

“You should probably get dressed.” Getting there early might not answer any questions, but neither would hiding by the baths.

Yuri heaved yet another sigh and continued to drip on the floor.

“Not that I’m complaining.”

Otabek caught Yuri’s eye through the mirror and attempted a confident, teasing smirk. In his opinion, he looked more constipated than flirty, but Yuri’s eyes went wide as his entire body flushed and he started to cough.

“Ma- make me, then,” Yuri wheezed.

“Maybe later.”

“You’re so bad-“ Otabek patted Yuri’s back as he gasped for breath and rasped, “So bad at this. _Maybe later?_ Kinky.”

“I’m not taking come-on advice from someone who just choked on his own emo sighs,” Otabek shot back, trying and failing to suppress a smile. “You okay?”

“Overcome with passion,” Yuri said, clearing his throat. “Now I know you have a thing for people putting on clothes which basically took a massive shit all over my naïve innocence, so I hope you’re proud of yourself. Are we late?”

“Not yet-“

Yuri left the towel tied around his hips and pulled on his shirt, throwing an exaggerated wink in Otabek’s direction. He’d seemed a bit self-conscious earlier, but… well. They’d gone from competitors to best friends in a few hours, so it wasn’t like Yuri took a long time to adjust.

“Yura, you’re ridiculous.”

“Oooh, Beka, I’m putting my socks on, don’t you want to help?”

“I-“

“Anyway, having any last-minute strokes of genius or some shit like that? Ow.”

“Uh.” Maybe just a normal stroke. Otabek blinked. Yuri, now fully dressed, ripped tangles from his damp hair with his fingers as he headed out of the changing room and towards the garden. “No. You?”

“Nope. Victor’s going to find out that someone stole the cake topper and go on a bloodthirsty rampage.”

“Really? I thought Yuuri was more the rampaging type.”

“Yuuri would poison everyone’s dinner and look really disappointed.” 

Otabek snorted. “Okay, so it’s not the end of the world.”

“I guess not.” They joined the trickle of people making their way to the front of the inn, and Yuri dropped his voice to a whisper. “At least we don’t have to give them some lame-ass explanation about how we don’t have a present because someone broke into your room and stole it.”

“They’d understand- huh. Yura. Look.” Otabek gestured to Makkachin, who had her nose pressed to the walking path as she snuffled around in the grass and dirt. “Dogs have a really good sense of smell.”

“I mean, yeah? They’re dogs, but Makkachin can’t find…” Yuri stopped in his tracks; Otabek, half a step behind, slammed into his shoulder. Yuri didn’t seem to notice. “Do you think she actually-“

Their frantic whispers were interrupted when a red-eyed Minami barreled across the grass, shrieking, and threw his arms around the poodle.

“Makka!” he squeaked, followed by something in rapid-fire Japanese that Otabek couldn’t quite catch. A tear rolled down his cheek.

“I think he said he’s been looking for her,” Yuri translated. “Which means…”

“Hello!” Victor called, and the crowd – though that was a generous description – fell silent. Beside him, Yuuri stood up straighter.

“Thanks for coming out, everyone,” Yuuri said, shifting nervously. He wasn’t loud, but he didn’t have to be. When Yuuri spoke like that, everyone paid attention. Otabek bit his lip. Yuri chewed on a strand of hair. “I just need to go over a couple of things. First…” Yuuri took a deep breath. “First, I’m not naming names, but everyone needs to understand that there’s absolutely no eating or drinking allowed anywhere near the baths.”

Yuri’s elbow jabbed into Otabek’s ribs.

“Is this really-“ he hissed.

“It’s unhygienic and disrespectful to other guests,” Yuuri continued, “even if there’s no one else there. We’re grateful that you all were able to join us, but if there’s so much as a gum wrapper in the changing room, I _will_ find you and you _will_ scrub toilets for a week.”

Otabek felt himself break into a sweat. He’d put an apple in his locker once, but he hadn’t eaten it, and he’d…

“Yura,” he whispered. “I left-“

“I got it for you,” Yuri muttered back. “Also, I ate it. But don’t worry, Katsudon will never know.”

Yuuri chose that moment to make eye contact with Yuri, who paled. Yuuri smiled.

“Also, don’t use the baths if you’ve had any alcohol. Aside from the obvious reasons, it can be very dangerous – the floor in there gets really slippery, but more importantly, there’s a huge risk of heat exhaustion, dehydration, unconsciousness, drowning, and so on. We’d be so upset if anyone got hurt or died in the onsen, so please be careful. That’s everything. Thank you. See you tonight!”

Sara and Isabella wore near-identical expressions of guilt, and Mila’s gaze was pointedly fixed on a spot of sky over Yuuri’s head.

JJ, however, didn’t seem to have anything on his conscience as he loudly added, “What about Bella’s necklace? And Otabek’s bag?”

He was met with quizzical looks, though the string of curses Yuri let out under his breath was pretty impressive.

“What about them?” Victor asked.

“They were stolen. Right, Beks?”

Several guests had begun to slip away once Yuuri’s announcements were over, but they froze and turned to stare as a hush fell over the garden.

“Well.” Otabek swallowed hard. Everyone – _everyone_ – was looking at him, which he should have been used to by now, but this was worse than falling in a competition. “It- um.”

“We know what happened,” Yuri said, coming to his rescue. “Okay, maybe with the stupid necklace, maybe not, but I really don’t give a fuck.”

“Otabek, what happened to your bag?” Yuuri frowned. “Did you check the lost and found, or-“

“My door was open when I got back from my run, and I couldn’t find my backpack,” Otabek explained, acquiescing to Yuri’s insistent prods. “One of the guests in the lobby said he’d seen someone run by, and that they’d dropped a tube of lipstick.”

“That was me!” Minami jumped to his feet, his eyes huge. “But I didn’t take your bag, I promise, I found some blue lipstick lying in the hall upstairs and I was taking it down to the front desk in case someone was looking for it because it looked really cool and expensive and I didn’t want them to lose it and then Makkachin was running and I had to try to catch her and-“

Yuri grinned.

“Blue lipstick?” Georgi asked. He put a hand to his forehead. “You found it? You really found it? Oh, I can’t believe it, I just can’t thank you enough.” He turned to them. “Can I have-“

“Not yet,” Yuri snapped. He was enjoying this, Otabek realized. “Anyway, Otabek noticed that the lipstick had Chinese writing on it, so we asked Guang Hong and he told us the lipstick was from Changle Road.”

“If you wanted some, I could have told you that,” Georgi said, nonplussed.

“I did have a question, actually.” Otabek took the lipstick out of his pocket. “We also found a list stuck inside the tube. By the way, I broke it a little. I’m very sorry. I’m happy to replace it-”

“A very interesting list,” Yuri interrupted. “Since it included a bag, like what was just stolen from Otabek, and blue lipstick, which had been dropped by someone running away from Otabek’s room, and a necklace, and Isabella’s necklace had gone missing. That got us really confused. So, Georgi, what _is_ that list?”

Georgi sniffed. “It’s not important.”

“Really? Why’d you hide it, then?” Yuri narrowed his eyes. “Georgi, you’re terrible at keeping secrets, don’t even try me.”

“If you absolutely must know…” Georgi sighed, but Otabek had the impression he was overjoyed for the chance to monologue. “It’s my muse. There are so many emotions surrounding weddings, so much love, so much happiness, so much loneliness, and it’s simply overwhelming. This _list_ represents every person and feeling. You see, I’ve been writing a poem-“

“Did you write the list?” Otabek said, cutting in before Georgi could really get going. “Why?”

“Of course not,” Georgi replied impatiently. “I said it’s my _muse._ Where would the world be if we went around creating our own muses?”

“So who-“

It was Chris who answered, towering above them in his imposing platform boots and half-hiding a smile. “I did. It’s a list of wedding supplies and other items for purposes that will soon be revealed to all.” He leaned in close to Otabek’s ear, gestured for Yuri to listen, and murmured, “You know Victor’s bachelor party? Well, we decided that dear Yuuri might like some entertainment, if you know what I mean.”

“Nope.” Yuri made a show of gagging. “Please stop talking.”

Chris smiled at Otabek. “We are _very_ good dancers, and who else would Yuuri want to watch?”

He stood up (and up, and up) and said, loud enough for everyone to hear, “So you see, the list isn’t anything important.”

“Hey!”

“The list is not important to anyone except Georgi,” Chris amended. “See?”

“That’s why you wanted a necklace this morning?” Mila asked Georgi. “Do you remember which one it was? I was still half-asleep, honestly, I don’t remember at all.”

Georgi hummed to himself. “A gold one, with a heart charm. Cute, but, and I do hope you won’t take this the wrong way, a bit tacky.”

If Georgi turned around, he would see Isabella glowering at him, her eyes dark enough to kill. Even JJ looked a little nervous.

“Right,” Mila said quickly. “I’ll give you a different one, but I need that one back. It’s not mine - it was left in my room by mistake.” 

“That’s Isabella’s necklace found, then,” Otabek whispered to Yuri. “Should we…”

“Run?” Yuri muttered. “Probably.”

“Excuse me-“ Isabella began.

Mila gave Georgi’s shoulder a friendly slap. He stumbled forward a couple of steps, too stunned to protest as she dragged him away. “What do you say we go get that lovely, beautiful necklace _right now,_ Zhora? Really quickly, before anyone gets upset.”

His palm was sweaty. Otabek looked down and realized that he’d grabbed Yuri’s hand, ready to bolt for safety the moment tears started to flow – he wasn’t a coward, but no one was brave enough to step into a spat over fashion between the eternally heartbroken Georgi and Isabella, whose own wedding had been postponed yet again.

No one except Mila.

Otabek exhaled, and as if on cue, he and Yuri untangled their fingers and wiped their damp hands on their jeans. A few more guests slipped away, making a point to check their phones, frown, and scurry off like they’d just remembered they were due for an important meeting. 

“Very good!” Victor chirped. “You two have had quite a busy day!”

Yuri bristled.

“But what about your bag, Otabek?” Yuuri’s forehead was creased with worry. “You said your door was open?”

Almost everyone had sidled off by this point, leaving Yuri and Otabek with an audience of three. Yuuri and Victor stared at them intently while Makkachin, exhausted by her own busy day, snored gently at their feet. 

“Mari told us that one of the master keys was missing,” Yuri declared. “I don’t suppose you’d know anything about that, _Victor?_ ”

“Oh, yes! Thank you for the reminder, Yurio.” Victor patted his pockets. “I have it here somewhere…”

“Well?” Yuri demanded. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”

“What?” Victor and Yuuri replied simultaneously.

“Vitya didn’t take Otabek’s bag,” Yuuri protested. “Otabek, we should-“

Otabek took a step back, ignoring Yuri’s snickers. “I know he didn’t! But, um…”

“Yuuri, they think I’m a criminal,” Victor wailed. He threw his arms around Yuuri. “I’m a wanted man. Will you visit me in prison? Oh, and we were going to get _married!_ ”

“Yes, dear, I’ll write you letters every day and never so much as look at another man lover.”

Otabek glanced at Yuri, who shrugged.

“They’re teasing us, aren’t they?” Otabek whispered.

“Yep.”

“Are they going to stop soon?”

“Nope.” Yuri rolled his eyes, took a deep breath, and yelled, “HEY! EARTH TO BONNIE AND CLYDE!”

Otabek rubbed his ear.

“I’ll go quietly,” Victor sobbed. “I’m innocent, I tell you, and if you give me a fair trial I’ll prove it.”

“You didn’t go in my room?”

“Of course not.”

Otabek’s ears were slowly catching fire. He caught Yuri’s eye, ready to grovel, but Yuri shook his head: _not yet._

“You weren’t _really_ curious about our present?” Yuri asked. “The one I said was fucking amazing and you’d never be able to guess what it was?”

“I would never snoop, Yurio, cross my heart.”

“I told him that Mom would drown him in the onsen if he even thought about it,” Yuuri added. “She really would.”

Victor nodded solemnly. “I was just getting some of the nice tablecloths out of the storage room. Or trying to, at least – I couldn’t find anything. I was going to ask Mari if she knew where all of those boxes got off to.”

“I’m sleeping in the storage room,” Yuri retorted. “You’d better get your eyes checked, because it’s full of those damn boxes. Also, I told you to knock before you come in.”

“You were out!”

Something wasn’t adding up. Otabek frowned, trying to think.

“Which room did you look in, exactly?” he ventured. “What was the number?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Victor shrugged. “Yuuri said it was in Yurio’s room, so I went to his room.”

“How did you know which one was Yura’s room?”

“It’s the room he’s always in,” Victor said slowly. “His room. The room. Where he stays.”

“I’m always in Beka’s room, on account of how mine is filled with massive boxes that are going to fall and crush me in my sleep one day,” Yuri growled, realization dawning. “When did you go up?”

“Nine-ish.” Victor sighed. “Yurio, really-“

“I didn’t wake up until nine-thirty,” Yuri countered. “You didn’t go into my room.”

“Oh.” Yuuri covered his mouth. Otabek thought he was trying not to laugh. “Vitya…”

“You went into mine, which is next to Yuri’s,” Otabek guessed. “Which is why you didn’t find the tablecloths.”

Everyone was silent for a minute, except Makkachin, who continued to snore.

“Huh,” Victor concluded. “Oops.”

“Vitya,” Yuuri said reproachfully, “Did you-“

“No! Makkachin and I went in, I couldn’t find any boxes, and then Makka ran off so I followed her.” He winced. “Oh, I did say I’d text Minami when I found her. He ran off to look outside.”

Yuuri looked from Victor to Yuri to Otabek. “But then what happened to Otabek’s bag?”

Yuri and Otabek stared down to where Makkachin sprawled at their feet.

“So, our awesome present was actually several awesome presents put together,” Yuri explained. “You know that shop in Moscow that bakes special dog treats?”

“Oh, no,” Yuuri groaned. “Really?”

“She must have smelled them,” Otabek said. “And when she couldn’t get them out of the bag…”

“She grabbed the whole thing and ran for it,” concluded Yuri. “Victor, your dog is a crook.” 

“Makka would never do something like that!” Victor argued. “Right, sweetie?”

She opened her eyes, snorted, and wiggled until Victor bent down to scratch her belly.

“I’ll check our room,” Yuuri said.

The three of them watched him go, half-jogging up the path.

“How could you say something like that about an innocent creature?” Victor accused. “She’s a good girl.”

“Oh, I don’t know, it’s not like she ever stole food before and then got so sick you had to leave a competition to check on her,” Yuri grumbled. “Or tried to eat all of Potya’s food whenever you made me petsit, or-“

Victor sniffed. “You’ll see.”

A minute later, Yuuri appeared in the doorway, holding up a black bag.

“Is this it?” he called as he hurried over.

“Yes!”

“YES!” Yuri punched the air. “I fucking told you!”

“It’s a bit, uh, damp,” Yuuri said apologetically. “But I think everything’s there. Well, everything except…”

Otabek lifted his bag from Yuuri’s hands. The material around the zipper was soggy, flecked with crumbs, and slightly sticky.

“I guess she liked them,” he said eventually. “Thanks, Yuuri. Yura, do you want to…”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Otabek smiled to himself. He’d always enjoyed romantic comedies more than mysteries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Case closed... or is it?**
> 
> Word on the streets is that someone else thinks they've got the wrong gal, but can another investigator prove Makkachin's innocence and show everyone what really happened?

**Author's Note:**

> There's more than one way to gently bother this cat, that's for sure... and lucky for us, we don't have to choose! In the style of Clue, each author has the opportunity to solve this case by writing their own finale. Stay tuned: the detective dénouements will begin **July 27.**   
> Want to get in on the action? Tell us who _you_ think the culprit is using the clues and information provided in the story. When you post it, select "This work is a remix, a translation, a podfic, or was inspired by another work." 
> 
> Now, one more round of applause for the detectives backstage!
> 
> **Prelude** \- iguanastevens  
>  _"After a life spent chasing shadows, I know better than anyone that nothing is black and white."_  
>  **Crimes of Fashion** \- Wonder Cat  
>  **Get a Clue** \- Lin (thesameoldfairytale). [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesameoldfairytale/profile)] _"Whatever the mystery, nothing will stop her from discovering the truth."_  
>  **Silk and Secrets** \- sonder-and-kenopsia [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Survivor_at_Midnight/)] [[tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/sonder-and-kenopsia)]  
>  _"I suppose I'll be the Dora of this little group. You guys need something? Paper? Pens? Forensic Kit? Blowtorch? Anvil? I got you. Out of allergy meds, sorry. And don't ask where I keep my charger, I'm not telling."_  
>  **The Skeleton Key** \- iguanastevens  
>  **Riddles, Mysteries, and Enigmas** \- KinoGlowWorm [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KinoGlowWorm/pseuds/KinoGlowWorm/works)]  
>  **A Collector's Item** \- Kenda1l [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kenda1L)] [[twitter](https://twitter.com/Kenda1l1)]  
>  **The Mystery of the Stolen Heart** \- emotabek (galaxy_witch) [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxy_witch/)] [[twitter](https://twitter.com/emotabek)]  
>  _"Noelle, who is more commonly known by her undercover pseudonyms emotabek or galaxy_witch, was recruited along with many talented detectives to crack Otabek and Yuri's mysterious case! Will her close attention to detail help the other detectives solve the mystery, or will her tendency to overthink lead to her downfall?"_  
>  **If the Shoe Fits** \- KuraiOfAnagura [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KuraiOfAnagura/works)] [[twitter](https://twitter.com/KuraiWrites)]  
>  _"Fanfictions have ruined my youth more thoroughly than any drug ever could. Heroin, Cocaine? Pah, candy, if you ask me. I’ve been there when the HarryXDraco FFs flooded the internet. Beyblade, YuGiOh, Kingdom Hearts… I’ve tried them all and they used my creativity, chewed me down and spat me out afterwards… only to crawl to the next fandom in dire need of my next fix.  
>  The work of a fanfiction writer is hard work, honest, sure, but hard. Whenever I’m confronted with a case I take a deep hit from the fandom and hope the clues come by one after another. My current muse is Yuri on Ice. Don’t know how long she’ll have me in her cold icy grasp. But I’ll continue writing fanfictions for her. Because that’s what I do."_  
>  **An Inside Job** \- Rodinia [[AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia)] [[tumblr](rodiniaorzetalthepenquin.tumblr.com)] _"Not the most observant, but can put things together like nobody's business."_  
>  **The Eleventh Hour** \- iguanastevens


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